Policemen are numbered in case they get lost.
SPIKE MILLIGANAre you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs?
More Spike Milligan Quotes
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I shook hands with a friendly Arab. I still have my right arm to prove it.
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Aristocrats have heirs; the poor have children; the rest keep dogs.
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This silent call you make, A silence so loud I fear the world knows it’s meaning If you fill every corner of a room Where can I look? If I close my eyes the silence becomes louder! There is no escape from you The only way out is in
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Her mother was a cultivated woman – she was born in a greenhouse.
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There is a time to live, a time to die, a time to laugh, and at no time are the three of them very far apart.
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A bird in The Strand is worth two in Shepherds Bush.
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Australia, Australia, we love you from the heart. The kidneys, the liver & the giblets too. And every other part.
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I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.
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We were making love in the back of a truck and we got carried away.
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Money can’t buy friends, but you can get a better class of enemy.
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To Harry Secombe: I hope you die first as I don’t want you singing at my funeral.
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Blessed are the cracked, for they let in the light.
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Chopsticks are one of the reasons the Chinese never invented custard.
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My Father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic.
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I can speak Esperanto like a native.
SPIKE MILLIGAN