We haven’t got a plan so nothing can go wrong!
SPIKE MILLIGANAre you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs?
More Spike Milligan Quotes
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I told you I was ill. (On his headstone)
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And God said, ‘Let there be light’ and there was light, but the Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected.
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Only on the third class tourist class passengers’ deck was it a sultry overcast morning, but then if you do things on the cheap you must expect these things.
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Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it’s all in perfect working order.
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It was a perfect marrige. She didn`t want to and he couldn`t
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I cannot stand being awake, the pain is too much.
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You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all the people some of the time, which is just long enough to be president of the United States.
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Are you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs?
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I’m a hero with coward’s legs.
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Education isn’t everything, for a start it isn’t an elephant.
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We were making love in the back of a truck and we got carried away.
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I can speak Esperanto like a native.
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Render any politician down and there’s enough fat to fry an egg.
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Aristocrats have heirs; the poor have children; the rest keep dogs.
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Any man can be 62, but it takes a bus to be 62A.
SPIKE MILLIGAN