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I went to a fight the other night, and a hockey game broke out.

Rodney Dangerfield

Related Topics

Broke Game Hockey Night Other Out Went

Bagwalas

Popular Authors

Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up.
RODNEY DANGERFIELD

Cat Cover Kept Me Play Sandbox Up
Life is just a bowl of pits.
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Bowl Just Life Pit
I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it.
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Frink Last Much Olive Sample Time Too
I worked in a pet store and people would ask how big I would get.
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Ask How Big People Pet Store Work
My uncle’s dying wish – he wanted me on his lap. He was in the electric chair.
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Brown Sie Told Uncle Wear Wish Yellow
I have good looking kids. Thank goodness my wife cheats on me.
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Cheat Good Goodness Kid Look Me Wife
With me, nothing goes right. My psychiatrist said my wife and I should have sex every night. Now, we’ll never see each other!
RODNEY DANGERFIELD

Each Other Every Goe never Night Nothing Psychiatrist Right Seen Sex Wife
We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations – we’re doing everything we can to keep our marriage together.
RODNEY DANGERFIELD

Everything Marriage Room Sepaetae Sleep Together Vacation
I told my dentist my teeth are going yellow. he told me to wear a brown tie.
RODNEY DANGERFIELD

Brown Dentist Go Teeth Tie Told Wear Yellow
I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face.
RODNEY DANGERFIELD

Asleep Blind Day Face Kid Library Man One Pimple Plenty Raed Wake
My father carries around the picture of the kid who came with his wallet.
RODNEY DANGERFIELD

Around Came Carry Father Picture Wallet
One year they asked me to be poster boy – for birth control.
RODNEY DANGERFIELD

Ask Birth Boy Control One Poster Year
I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof.
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Father Finger Kidnap More Piece Proof Remember Sent Time Want
I haven’t spoken to my wife in years. I didn’t want to interrupt her.
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Interrupt Spoken Wife Year
My wife can’t cook at all. She made chocolate mousse. An antler got stuck in my throat.
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All Antier Chocolate Cook Got Mae Mouse Stuck Throat Wife
Men who do things without being told draw the most wages.
RODNEY DANGERFIELD

Being Do Draw Men Most Thing Told Wage

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