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If you don’t have wrinkles, you haven’t laughed enough.

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Enough Laugh Wrinkle

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

The only thing my husband and I have in common is that we were married on the same day.
PHYLLIS DILLER

Common Day Husband Married Only Same Thing
I spent seven hours in a beauty shop… and that was for the estimate.
PHYLLIS DILLER

Beuty Estimate Hour Seven Shop Spent
Before you get married you should meet your fiance’s parents. It is not enough that you like his parole officer.
PHYLLIS DILLER

Before Enough Fiance Get Marry Meet Officer Parent Parole
Aim high, and you won’t shoot your foot off.
PHYLLIS DILLER

Aim Fool High Off Shoot
Do not taste food while you’re cooking. You may lose your nerve to serve it.
PHYLLIS DILLER

Cook Food Lose May never Serve Taste
I never made `Who’s Who,’ but I’m featured in `What’s That?’
PHYLLIS DILLER

Feature Made never That What
Oh, that dog! Ever hear of a German Shepherd that bites its nails? Barks with a lisp? You say, “Attack!” And he has one. All he does is piddle. He’s nothing but a fur-covered kidney that barks.
PHYLLIS DILLER

Attack Country Dog Even Hear Ible Lisp Mail One People Person Piddle
I don’t know how you feel about old age… but in my case I didn’t even see it coming. It hit me from the rear.
PHYLLIS DILLER

Age Come How Feel Me Old Rear See Should
By far the most common craving of pregnant women is not to be pregnant.
PHYLLIS DILLER

Common Crave Far Mist Pregnant Prepare Women
The real reason your pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can’t see him laughing at you.
PHYLLIS DILLER

Down Head Kwwp Laugh Pro Real Reson See Tell
My idea of exercise is a good brisk sit.
PHYLLIS DILLER

Brisk Excercise Good Idea Sit
A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.
PHYLLIS DILLER

Curve Set Smile Straight
I admit, I have a tremendous sex drive. My boyfriend lives forty miles away.
PHYLLIS DILLER

Admit Away Boyfriend Drive Forty Live Mile Sex Tremendous
My photographs don’t do me justice – they just look like me.
PHYLLIS DILLER

Just Justice Like Look Photograph
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
PHYLLIS DILLER

Bed Fight Go never Stay Up
Old age is when the liver spots show through your gloves.
PHYLLIS DILLER

Age Glove Love Old Sport Through

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