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A terrible thing happened to me last night again—nothing.

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Again Happen Last Night Nothing Terrible Thing

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

I’m the only woman who can walk in Central Park at night… and reduce the crime rate.
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When you play spin the bottle, if they don’t want to kiss you they have to give you a quarter. Well, hell, by the time I was twelve years old I owned my own home.
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I spent seven hours in a beauty shop… and that was for the estimate.
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Nothing was happening in the bedroom. I nicknamed our waterbed the Dead Sea.
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Do not taste food while you’re cooking. You may lose your nerve to serve it.
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My own laugh is the real thing and I’ve had it all my life.
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I like to serve chocolate cake, because it doesn’t show the dirt.
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Christmas is a time when everybody wants his past forgotten and his present remembered.
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I once wore a peekaboo blouse. People would peek and then they’d boo.
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Burt Reynolds once asked me out. I was in his room.
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Housework can’t kill you, but why take a chance?
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Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing.
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Maybe it’s true that life begins at fifty. But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.
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My husband is so cheap. On Christmas Eve, he fires one shot and tells the kids Santa committed suicide.
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The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron.
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If my jeans could talk, they’d plead for mercy.
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