I must have a prodigious amount of mind; it takes me as much as a week, sometimes, to make it up!
MARK TWAINIf animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much.
More Mark Twain Quotes
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The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven not man’s.
MARK TWAIN -
The human race has only one really effective weapon and that is laughter.
MARK TWAIN -
In the beginning of a change the patriot is a scarce man, and brave, and hated and scorned. When his cause succeeds, the timid join him, for then it costs nothing to be a patriot.
MARK TWAIN -
I didn’t have time to write a short letter, so I wrote a long one instead.
MARK TWAIN -
Always do what is right. It will gratify half of mankind and astound the other.
MARK TWAIN -
What is Man? Man is a noisome bacillus whom Our Heavenly Father created because he was disappointed in the monkey.
MARK TWAIN -
A lie can travel half way around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.
MARK TWAIN -
Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more.
MARK TWAIN -
There’s one way to find out if a man is honest: ask him; if he says yes, you know he’s crooked.
MARK TWAIN -
Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.
MARK TWAIN -
The more I learn about people, the more I like my dog.
MARK TWAIN -
When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.
MARK TWAIN -
If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.
MARK TWAIN -
It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare.
MARK TWAIN -
If you don’t read the newspaper, you’re uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you’re mis-informed.
MARK TWAIN