Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today.
GROUCHO MARXI am free of all prejudices. I hate every one equally.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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Do you mind if I don’t smoke?
GROUCHO MARX -
Just give me a comfortable couch, a dog, a good book, and a woman.
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All people are born alike except Republicans and Democrats.
GROUCHO MARX -
My mother loved children – she would have given anything if I had been one.
GROUCHO MARX -
If you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce, they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does.
GROUCHO MARX -
I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll be glad to make an exception.
GROUCHO MARX -
Next time I see you, remind me not to talk to you.
GROUCHO MARX -
I wouldn’t want to belong to a club that would have me as a member.
GROUCHO MARX -
I am free of all prejudices. I hate every one equally.
GROUCHO MARX -
Whatever it is, I’m against it.
GROUCHO MARX -
I think women are sexy when they got some clothes on. And if later they take them off then you’ve triumphed.
GROUCHO MARX -
Time wounds all heels.
GROUCHO MARX -
Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
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One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas I’ll never know.
GROUCHO MARX -
From the moment I picked up your book until I put it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.
GROUCHO MARX