Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
GROUCHO MARXI am free of all prejudices. I hate every one equally.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy
GROUCHO MARX -
I only write first editions.
GROUCHO MARX -
My mother loved children – she would have given anything if I had been one.
GROUCHO MARX -
We’ll meet at the theater tonight. I’ll hold your seat ’til you get there. Once you get there; you’re on your own.
GROUCHO MARX -
Time wounds all heels.
GROUCHO MARX -
Why, look at me. I’ve worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.
GROUCHO MARX -
Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn’t arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I’m going to be happy in it.
GROUCHO MARX -
Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog it’s too dark to read.
GROUCHO MARX -
A year ago I came here without a nickle in my pocket, now, I’ve got a nickle in my pocket.
GROUCHO MARX -
Well, art is art, isn’t it? Still, on the other hand, water is water!
GROUCHO MARX -
Getting older is no problem. You just have to live long enough.
GROUCHO MARX -
Room service? Send up a larger room.
GROUCHO MARX -
Next time I see you, remind me not to talk to you.
GROUCHO MARX -
I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
GROUCHO MARX -
Die in the West and you’re halfway to Heaven.
GROUCHO MARX