Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy
GROUCHO MARXI love my cigar too, but I take it out of my mouth once in a while.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.
GROUCHO MARX -
Here’s to our wives and girlfriends, may they never meet!
GROUCHO MARX -
I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll be glad to make an exception.
GROUCHO MARX -
I think women are sexy when they got some clothes on. And if later they take them off then you’ve triumphed.
GROUCHO MARX -
Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog it’s too dark to read.
GROUCHO MARX -
Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn’t arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I’m going to be happy in it.
GROUCHO MARX -
Why don’t you bore a hole in yourself and let the sap run out?
GROUCHO MARX -
Any place I hang my head is home.
GROUCHO MARX -
You can leave in a huff. Or you can leave in a minute and a huff.
GROUCHO MARX -
If I hold you any closer I’ll be in back of you!
GROUCHO MARX -
I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn’t it.
GROUCHO MARX -
A man is only as old as the woman he feels.
GROUCHO MARX -
Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.
GROUCHO MARX -
I don’t have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They’re upstairs in my socks.
GROUCHO MARX -
Most young women do not welcome promiscuous advances.
GROUCHO MARX