If you’re not having fun, you’re doing something wrong.
GROUCHO MARXDie in the West and you’re halfway to Heaven.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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Hollywood brides keep the bouquets and throw away the grooms.
GROUCHO MARX -
I’m not crazy about reality, but it’s still the only place to get a decent meal.
GROUCHO MARX -
Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped.
GROUCHO MARX -
The trouble with writing a book about yourself is that you can’t fool around.
GROUCHO MARX -
Any place I hang my head is home.
GROUCHO MARX -
Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
GROUCHO MARX -
If I hold you any closer I’ll be in back of you!
GROUCHO MARX -
She got her looks from her father. He’s a plastic surgeon.
GROUCHO MARX -
If you are one of those lucky persons who own a pen that writes underwater, you might try living in a swimming pool.
GROUCHO MARX -
Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him.
GROUCHO MARX -
You can leave in a huff. Or you can leave in a minute and a huff.
GROUCHO MARX -
If a black cat crosses your path, it signifies that the animal is going somewhere.
GROUCHO MARX -
I love to read. My education is self-inflicted.
GROUCHO MARX -
Everyone must believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.
GROUCHO MARX -
Most young women do not welcome promiscuous advances.
GROUCHO MARX






