Anything that can’t be done in bed isn’t worth doing at all.
GROUCHO MARXAny place I hang my head is home.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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Just give me a comfortable couch, a dog, a good book, and a woman.
GROUCHO MARX -
Outside of a dog, a book is man’s best friend. Inside of a dog it’s too dark to read.
GROUCHO MARX -
I must admit, I was born at an early age.
GROUCHO MARX -
Well, art is art, isn’t it? Still, on the other hand, water is water!
GROUCHO MARX -
Who says Television isn’t educational, as soon as the T.V. comes on I read a book.
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All geniuses die young.
GROUCHO MARX -
She’s so in love with me, she doesn’t know anything. That’s why she’s in love with me.
GROUCHO MARX -
In studying your basic metabolism, we first listen to your heart’s beat.
GROUCHO MARX -
I intend to live forever, or die trying.
GROUCHO MARX -
I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn’t it.
GROUCHO MARX -
I don’t have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They’re upstairs in my socks.
GROUCHO MARX -
I’ve got a good mind to go out and join a club and beat you over the head with it.
GROUCHO MARX -
I never go to movies where the hero’s tits are bigger than the heroine’s.
GROUCHO MARX -
Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
GROUCHO MARX -
I’m not crazy about reality, but it’s still the only place to get a decent meal.
GROUCHO MARX