I love to read. My education is self-inflicted.
GROUCHO MARXAny place I hang my head is home.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today.
GROUCHO MARX -
All people are born alike except Republicans and Democrats.
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If you’re not having fun, you’re doing something wrong.
GROUCHO MARX -
He may look like an idiot and talk like an idiot but don’t let that fool you. He really is an idiot.
GROUCHO MARX -
I don’t have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They’re upstairs in my socks.
GROUCHO MARX -
If you are one of those lucky persons who own a pen that writes underwater, you might try living in a swimming pool.
GROUCHO MARX -
Love flies out the door when money comes innuendo.
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You can leave in a huff. Or you can leave in a minute and a huff.
GROUCHO MARX -
Hollywood brides keep the bouquets and throw away the grooms.
GROUCHO MARX -
If I hold you any closer I’ll be in back of you!
GROUCHO MARX -
Die in the West and you’re halfway to Heaven.
GROUCHO MARX -
Who says Television isn’t educational, as soon as the T.V. comes on I read a book.
GROUCHO MARX -
The only real laughter comes from despair.
GROUCHO MARX -
Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.
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Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?
GROUCHO MARX






