All British castles and old country homes are supposed to be haunted. It’s in the lease.
BOB HOPEI love to go to Washington – if only to be near my money.
More Bob Hope Quotes
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One of our stock lines used to be “There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for Bing, and there’s nothing he wouldn’t do for me.” And that’s the way we go through life – doing nothing for each other!
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It was a typically British birth… I was three at the time. They had a strike in the maternity ward… I came out in sympathy.
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We flew over to England by the same route Churchill took. It was easy. All we had to do was follow the cigar ashes.
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I don’t know if the presidential candidates are running for the White House or Animal House.
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The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.
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Eighty is when you order a steak and the headwaiter puts it through the blender. Or when you wake up as many times during the night as Burt Reynolds, but not for the same reason.
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Happiness is watching the TV at your girlfriend’s house during a power failure.
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Tokyo cab drivers are all ex-kamikaze pilots.
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The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends.
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When I miss a shot I just think what a beautiful day it is. And what pure fresh air I’m breathing. Then I take a deep breath. I have to do that. That’s what gives me the strength to break the club.
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I never kick my ball in the rough or improve my lie in a sand trap. For that I have a caddie.
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Personally, I never drink on Oscar nights, as it interferes with my suffering.
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Sure, we did need the oil in America. How else could Dolly Parton get into some of her dresses?
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If my golf game was a prize fight, they’d stop it.
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Culture is the ability to describe Jane Russell without moving your hands
BOB HOPE