I don’t do a lot of political jokes. Too many are getting elected.
BOB HOPEOne of the greatest gifts to mankind is laughter, and one of the greatest gifts to laughter is Lucille Ball. God has her now but thanks to television, we’ll have her forever.
More Bob Hope Quotes
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You could buy my book in a paperback edition for a dollar, and in hard covers for $3.50. And for fifty cents extra.
BOB HOPE -
I went to play golf and tried to shoot my age, but I shot my weight instead.
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It was a great honour to be inducted into the Hall of Fame. I didn’t know they had a caddie division.
BOB HOPE -
Golf is my profession Show business is just to pay the green fees.
BOB HOPE -
Eighty is when you order a steak and the headwaiter puts it through the blender. Or when you wake up as many times during the night as Burt Reynolds, but not for the same reason.
BOB HOPE -
I have seen what a laugh can do. It can transform almost unbearable tears into something bearable, even hopeful.
BOB HOPE -
You know what a fan letter is – it’s just an inky raspberry.
BOB HOPE -
Golf is a game that needlessly prolongs the lives of some of our most useless citizens.
BOB HOPE -
On one hole, I hit an alligator so hard, he’s now my golf bag.
BOB HOPE -
She got to enjoy the personal side of the players. They were her kids. The Braves were her family.
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I like to come to Washington, D.C., at least once a year. Why should my tax money travel more than I do?
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He hits the ball 130 yards and his jewelry goes 150.
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I ruined my hands in the ring. The referee kept stepping on them.
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There’s a very apt saying in show business: “If you don’t go over budget in Paris, you’re either very rich or very sick. “
BOB HOPE -
Bing Crosby and I weren’t the types to go around kissing each other. We always had a light jab for each other.
BOB HOPE