I tell jokes to pay my green fees.
BOB HOPEPlease don’t stand up on my account.
More Bob Hope Quotes
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Happiness is watching the TV at your girlfriend’s house during a power failure.
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Kids are wonderful, but I like mine barbecued.
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She got to enjoy the personal side of the players. They were her kids. The Braves were her family.
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When I miss a shot I just think what a beautiful day it is. And what pure fresh air I’m breathing. Then I take a deep breath. I have to do that. That’s what gives me the strength to break the club.
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I can’t give up Golf, I’ve got too many sweaters.
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Ronald Reagan is not a typical politician because he doesn’t know how to lie, cheat, and steal. He’s always had an agent for that.
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I don’t know what people have against Jimmy Carter. He’s done nothing.
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I once showed Pat Bradley my swing and said, ‘What do I do next?’ Pat replied, ‘Wait till the pain dies down.’
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I was lucky I wasn’t a better boxer, or that’s what I’d be now – a punchy ex-pug.
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It’s a wonderful way to live, and not a bad way to go, either. The average Frenchman is still smiling three months after he’s dead.
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That’s life. The older you get, the tougher it is to score.
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I have performed for 12 presidents and entertained only six.
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There are many talented English personalities, but unfortunately they were all in Hollywood.
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Laughter is therapy-an instant vacation.
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I’ve been playing the game so long that my handicap is in Roman numerals.
BOB HOPE