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I never kick my ball in the rough or improve my lie in a sand trap. For that I have a caddie.

Bob Hope

A very, very religious man. Every time I eat a peanut, I feel immortal.
BOB HOPE

Men One Line Religious
The home videos aren’t as good, but they are seeming to get better.
BOB HOPE

Better Get Home Video
I’ve got to watch myself these days. It’s too exciting watching anyone else.
BOB HOPE

Days Line One These Watches
I was lucky, you know, I always had a beautiful girl and the money was good. Although I would have done the whole thing over for, oh, perhaps half.
BOB HOPE

Although Beautiful Girl Lucky Over Thing Whole
You know what a fan letter is – it’s just an inky raspberry.
BOB HOPE

Fans Letters Raspberries
If you watch a game, it’s fun. If you play it, it’s recreation. If you work at it, it’s golf.
BOB HOPE

Funny Hope Inspirational Sports
All British castles and old country homes are supposed to be haunted. It’s in the lease.
BOB HOPE

Country Funny Humorous Old
The best thing about growing older is that it takes such a long time.
BOB HOPE

Age Growing Long
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends.
BOB HOPE

Dieting Friend Good Loss Weight
To give you an idea of how fast we travelled – we left with two rabbits and when we arrived we still had only two.
BOB HOPE

Arrive Giving Ideas Still Two
If he slices the budget like he slices a golf ball, the nation has nothing to worry about.
BOB HOPE

Balls Golf Nation Slice Worry
Bigamy is the only crime where two rites make a wrong.
BOB HOPE

Comedy Funny Marriage Two
In England when you make a movie even the weather is against you.
BOB HOPE

Funny Rain Weather
Television is the box they buried entertainment in.
BOB HOPE

Boxes Entertainment Television
Culture is the ability to describe Jane Russell without moving your hands
BOB HOPE

Culture Hands Moving
If I had that kind of money, I wouldn’t come to Vietnam, I’d send for it.
BOB HOPE

Country Kind Line Money One People

I never kick my ball in the rough or improve my lie in a sand trap. For that I have a caddie.

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I never kick my ball in the rough or improve my lie in a sand trap. For that I have a caddie.

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Popular Authors

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