Jimmy Stewart could have been a good golfer, but he speaks so slowly that by the time he yells ‘Fore!’ the guy he’s hit is already in an ambulance on the way to the hospital.
BOB HOPEJimmy Stewart could have been a good golfer, but he speaks so slowly that by the time he yells ‘Fore!’ the guy he’s hit is already in an ambulance on the way to the hospital.
BOB HOPEThe Governor has no presidential aspirations. In fact he just made a tour of 43 states just to tell them he’s not running for anything.
BOB HOPEIt’s amazing how many people you see on TV. I did my first television show a month ago, and the next day five million television sets were sold. The people who couldn’t sell theirs threw them away.
BOB HOPEI never kick my ball in the rough or improve my lie in a sand trap. For that I have a caddie.
BOB HOPEChiropractic is a wonderful means of natural healing!
BOB HOPEOne of the greatest gifts to mankind is laughter, and one of the greatest gifts to laughter is Lucille Ball. God has her now but thanks to television, we’ll have her forever.
BOB HOPEAll British castles and old country homes are supposed to be haunted. It’s in the lease.
BOB HOPEThe Concorde is great. It gives you three extra hours to find your luggage.
BOB HOPEPeople who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.
BOB HOPEA few years ago he had a big heart transplant in Chicago, a five-hour operation. It took the doctors four hours to get him on the operating table.
BOB HOPEAudiences are my best friends. You never tire of talking with your best friends.
BOB HOPEPebble Beach is Alcatraz with grass.
BOB HOPENot that they were that anxious to see Ronnie as President; they were afraid if he didn’t get elected, he’d go back to acting.
BOB HOPEThere was nothing subtle about our landing. The pilot just pointed the nose at the ground and let her rip.
BOB HOPEI have performed for 12 presidents and entertained only six.
BOB HOPEThe firm is really ahead of the times. It has a stock market ticker that prints its report on thin aspirins.
BOB HOPE