Golf is a game that needlessly prolongs the lives of some of our most useless citizens.
BOB HOPEI was called Rembrandt Hope in my boxing days, because I spent so much time on the canvas.
More Bob Hope Quotes
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If he slices the budget like he slices a golf ball, the nation has nothing to worry about.
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Laughter is therapy-an instant vacation.
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A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.
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I’ve been married fifty-five years and I’ve been home three weeks.
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A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn?
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The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.
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There are many talented English personalities, but unfortunately they were all in Hollywood.
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The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he’s really pissed off.
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In England when you make a movie even the weather is against you.
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You could buy my book in a paperback edition for a dollar, and in hard covers for $3.50. And for fifty cents extra.
BOB HOPE -
I tell jokes to pay my green fees.
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Cypress Point is such a beautiful place, but it’s also very exclusive. They had a very successful membership drive last month. They drove out forty members.
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I can’t give up Golf, I’ve got too many sweaters.
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Did you see where President Reagan finally got a hearing aid? People have been telling him to get one for years, but he couldn’t hear them.
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Most of the people who came for dancing lessons had Rumba ambitions and minuet bodies
BOB HOPE