Now that’s better than sex, but only if the salami is thickly sliced.
ALAN KINGThat’s the great thing about New Year’s, you get to be a year older.
More Alan King Quotes
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There’s a charm, there’s a rhythm, there’s a soul to Jewish humor.
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I think one of the big things about comedy is the ability for the audience to identify.
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It’s not easy being a father, but I’ve been allowed a comeback.
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Larry David finds a way to make jokes about the Holocaust. It would never have occurred to me. And it was funny.
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The other day my house caught fire.
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And humor has always been a weapon. You want to get even on somebody?
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Comedy is an amazing calling. Once you get that first laugh, it’s hard to turn away.
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When I read Dickens for the first time, I thought he was Jewish, because he wrote about oppression and bigotry, all the things that my father talked about.
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When I get up in the morning, I have to decide what I’m going to have for dinner or I can’t get through the day.
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We set no styles, no standards. We’re reflections. It’s a distorted mirror in the fun house.
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An old socialist-unionist who always considered himself a failure. His big line was: ‘Don’t end up like me.
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Comedy is a reflection. We create nothing.
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Milton took vaudeville, which, if you look up ‘vaudeville’ in the dictionary, right alongside of it, it says ‘Milton Berle’ – and he made it just a tremendous party.
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We watch society. As society behaves, then we have the ability to make fun of it.
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I just never saw my mother in any other room but the kitchen. There were always pots going.
ALAN KING