An old socialist-unionist who always considered himself a failure. His big line was: ‘Don’t end up like me.
ALAN KINGMy mother kept the house clean and we ate good.
More Alan King Quotes
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Larry David finds a way to make jokes about the Holocaust. It would never have occurred to me. And it was funny.
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I made it, Ma – Carnegie Hall. And I didn’t have to practice.
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When I was a kid, my father used to tell me that everybody was celebrating my birthday. That’s what the trees are all about.
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You know you are getting old when people tell you how good you look.
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My son says I never tell stories about anyone who’s living.
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That’s the great thing about New Year’s, you get to be a year older.
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When I was in the hospital they gave me apple juice every morning, even after I told them I didn’t like it. I had to get even.
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The world is full of little dictators trying to run your life.
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I always plan dinner first thing in the morning.
ALAN KING -
My father helped me leave. He said, ‘It’s all out there, it’s not here.’
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My favorite way to spend Saturday is in and out of bed, watching sports on TV and eating.
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I was a high school throw-out.
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As a parent, I’d – I’d be a better father.
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When I read Dickens for the first time, I thought he was Jewish, because he wrote about oppression and bigotry, all the things that my father talked about.
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Comedy is a reflection. We create nothing.
ALAN KING