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A summary of every Jewish holiday: They tried to kill us, we won, let’s eat!

Related Topics

Eat Every Holiday Jewish Kill Summer Try Won

Bagwalas

Popular Authors

Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

Ed Sullivan brought me to TV first in 1952, then Garry Moore’s program gave me a lot of confidence and freedom.
ALAN KING

Confidence First Freedom Gave Lot People Program Sullivan Television
Larry David finds a way to make jokes about the Holocaust. It would never have occurred to me. And it was funny.
ALAN KING

Funny Holocaust Joke Make Occur People Way
My mother kept the house clean and we ate good.
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Ate Clean Good House Kept Mother
You do live longer with bran, but you spend the last fifteen years on the toilet.
ALAN KING

Bran Fifteen Last Live Longer Spend Toilet Year
I don’t mind being 65, but nobody is gonna tell me to come in at 5:30 to have the early bird special.
ALAN KING

Being Bird Come Early Gonna Mind Sixty-five Special Tell
When I was a kid, my father used to tell me that everybody was celebrating my birthday. That’s what the trees are all about.
ALAN KING

All Birthday Celebrate Everybody Father Kid Tell Tree Use
The ability to absorb a book and make someone else’s words and story your own was exactly was I was doing on stage.
ALAN KING

Ability Absorb Book Else Exactly Make Someone Stage Story Word
That’s the great thing about New Year’s, you get to be a year older.
ALAN KING

Great New Older Thing Year
Everything my mother made had to cook for 80 hours, and when she made matzoh balls she didn’t know fluffy. Everything sank.
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Ball Everything Matzoh Mother Sank
One morning, I poured the apple juice into the specimen tube. The nurse held it up and said, ‘It’s a little cloudy.’ I took the tube from her and said, ‘Let me run it through again,’ and drank it. The nurse fainted.
ALAN KING

Again Apple Cloudy Drank Faint Juice Little Morning Nurse One Pour Run Specimen Tube
Villains are a ball. People have been laughing at me for 50 years, so I love to sit in the back of the theater and listen to them hate me.
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Back Ball Been Fifty Laugh Listen Love People Theatre Villian Year
You know you are getting old when people tell you how good you look.
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Get Good Know Look Old People Tell
There’s nobody to believe in anymore, nobody to trust.
ALAN KING

Any Believe More Nobody Trust
As life’s pleasures go, food is second only to sex. Except for salami and eggs.
ALAN KING

Egg Except Food Life Only Pleasure Salami Second Sex
And humor has always been a weapon. You want to get even on somebody?
ALAN KING

Always Art Even Humour Somebody Want Weapon
You want to attack somebody? Make fun of them.
ALAN KING

Attack Fun Make Somebody

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