You do live longer with bran, but you spend the last fifteen years on the toilet.
ALAN KINGAn old socialist-unionist who always considered himself a failure. His big line was: ‘Don’t end up like me.
More Alan King Quotes
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One thing I’ve never said in my whole life is, ‘Let’s have dinner at a Japanese restaurant.’
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You know you are getting old when people tell you how good you look.
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As a parent, I’d – I’d be a better father.
ALAN KING -
The other day my house caught fire.
ALAN KING -
We watch society. As society behaves, then we have the ability to make fun of it.
ALAN KING -
My father helped me leave. He said, ‘It’s all out there, it’s not here.’
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There’s nobody to believe in anymore, nobody to trust.
ALAN KING -
If you keep yourself alive and current, funny is funny.
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My mother kept the house clean and we ate good.
ALAN KING -
When I was a kid, my father used to tell me that everybody was celebrating my birthday. That’s what the trees are all about.
ALAN KING -
An old socialist-unionist who always considered himself a failure. His big line was: ‘Don’t end up like me.
ALAN KING -
That’s the great thing about New Year’s, you get to be a year older.
ALAN KING -
If you want to read about love and marriage, you’ve got to buy two separate books.
ALAN KING -
I didn’t know we were poor until I started giving interviews.
ALAN KING -
When I get up in the morning, I have to decide what I’m going to have for dinner or I can’t get through the day.
ALAN KING