The man with the best job in the country is the vice-president. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, ‘How is the president?’
WILL ROGERSThe only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn’t get worse every time Congress meets.
More Will Rogers Quotes
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It’s not what you pay a man, but what he costs you that counts.
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You never get a second chance to make a first impression.
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The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
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Work to make a living; serve to make a life.
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Sometimes people deserve a high five, in the face, with a chair.
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The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn’t get worse every time Congress meets.
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People who fly into a rage always make a bad landing.
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If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn’t have to advertise them.
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You can’t say civilization don’t advance, in every war they kill you in a new way.
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If you ever injected truth into politics you have no politics.
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We can’t all be heroes, because somebody has to sit on the curb and applaud when they go by.
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Advertising is the art of convincing people to spend money they don’t have for something they don’t need.
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Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.
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We will never have true civilization until we have learned to recognize the rights of others.
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Diplomacy is the art of saying ‘Nice doggie’ until you can find a rock.
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When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.
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When you find yourself in a hole, quit digging.
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On account of being a democracy and run by the people, we are the only nation in the world that has to keep a government four years, no matter what it does.
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Everything is funny, as long as it’s happening to somebody else.
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If Stupidity got us into this mess, then why can’t it get us out?
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The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.
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I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons.
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All I know is just what I read in the papers, and that’s an alibi for my ignorance.
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Never let yesterday use up too much of today.
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Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.
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There are three kinds of men. The one that learns by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence for themselves.
WILL ROGERS