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Sometimes people deserve a high five, in the face, with a chair.

Will Rogers

I don’t make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.
WILL ROGERS

Fact Government Joke Report Watch
I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons.
WILL ROGERS

Dog Politics Reason
You never get a second chance to make a first impression.
WILL ROGERS

Chance Impression Inspirational Life
Never miss a good chance to shut up.
WILL ROGERS

Chance Insult One Liner Shut Up
On account of being a democracy and run by the people, we are the only nation in the world that has to keep a government four years, no matter what it does.
WILL ROGERS

Account Democracy Government Nation People
Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.
WILL ROGERS

Finding Life Rush Save Time
There are three kinds of men. The one that learns by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence for themselves.
WILL ROGERS

Learning Men Observation Reading Stupidity
The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn’t get worse every time Congress meets.
WILL ROGERS

Death Difference Government Meet Tax Time
Always drink upstream from the herd.
WILL ROGERS

Drink Funny Leadership
Never slap a man who’s chewing tobacco.
WILL ROGERS

Chew Funny Man Slap Tabacoo
Everything is funny, as long as it’s happening to somebody else.
WILL ROGERS

Funny Happen Hard Time Tragedy
A vision, without a plan, is just a hallucination.
WILL ROGERS

Business Planning Vision
The more you observe politics, the more you’ve got to admit that each party is worse than the other.
WILL ROGERS

Admit Observe Party Politics Worse
If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn’t have to advertise them.
WILL ROGERS

Advertisement Amount Improvement Money
Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip.
WILL ROGERS

Ashame Gossip Live Parrot Sell
If Stupidity got us into this mess, then why can’t it get us out?
WILL ROGERS

Mess Stupidity Trouble

Sometimes people deserve a high five, in the face, with a chair.

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Sometimes people deserve a high five, in the face, with a chair.

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