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Don’t tempt me, I can resist anything but temptation.

Bob Hope

Don’t tempt me, I can resist anything but temptation.
BOB HOPE

Anything Resist Temptation
Happiness is watching the TV at your girlfriend’s house during a power failure.
BOB HOPE

Failure Girlfriend House Sex
I don’t do a lot of political jokes. Too many are getting elected.
BOB HOPE

Country People Political Jokes
A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn?
BOB HOPE

Heart Humor Laughter
It’s so cold here in Washington, D.C., that politicians have their hands in their own pockets.
BOB HOPE

Cold Hands Pockets Politician
Bigamy is the only crime where two rites make a wrong.
BOB HOPE

Comedy Funny Marriage Two
Kissing is like drinking tea with a tea strainer, you can never get enough.
BOB HOPE

Drinking Kissing Tea
The old water heater in my dressing room was working, but it was kind of tired. It gave off about as much warmth as an agent’s handshake.
BOB HOPE

Funny Handshake Tired Water
I’ve been married fifty-five years and I’ve been home three weeks.
BOB HOPE

Home Marriage Years
We have 51 golf courses in Palm Springs. He [President Ford] never decides which course he will play until after the first tee shot.
BOB HOPE

Courses Decide Golf Play Spring
She spoke perfect English, which led to considerable trouble. She couldn’t understand us at all.
BOB HOPE

America Funny Humorous
In England when you make a movie even the weather is against you.
BOB HOPE

Funny Rain Weather
US President Gerald Ford’s golf was so bad we thought he was a ‘Hitman for the PGA!
BOB HOPE

Ford Gerald Golf President
One of our stock lines used to be “There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for Bing, and there’s nothing he wouldn’t do for me.” And that’s the way we go through life – doing nothing for each other!
BOB HOPE

Each Lines Nothing Other Stock Way
England occupies a warm spot in my affections. It was the scene of my greatest performance. I was born there.
BOB HOPE

England Funny Humorous Performance
She said she was approaching forty, and I couldn’t help wondering from what direction.
BOB HOPE

Comedy Direction Helping Life Wondering

Don’t tempt me, I can resist anything but temptation.

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Don’t tempt me, I can resist anything but temptation.

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Popular Authors

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