I have too much money invested in sweaters.
BOB HOPEIn England when you make a movie even the weather is against you.
More Bob Hope Quotes
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Ronald Reagan is not a typical politician because he doesn’t know how to lie, cheat, and steal. He’s always had an agent for that.
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Out here in the Pacific, they have typhoons and hurricanes that blow over 200 miles an hour. We have tornadoes and hurricanes back home, but I don’t worry about them. The mortgage on my house is so heavy that nothing could budge it.
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I see the Beatles have arrived from England. They were 40 pounds overweight – and that was just their hair.
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The home videos aren’t as good, but they are seeming to get better.
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I feel very humble, but I think I have the strength of character to fight it.
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A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn?
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I’ll shoot my age if I have to live to be 105.
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Chiropractic is a wonderful means of natural healing!
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Dying is to be avoided because it can ruin your whole career.
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As the colonel and I sat swapping stories in the plane, a jet aircraft buzzed past our window.
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I was lucky, you know, I always had a beautiful girl and the money was good. Although I would have done the whole thing over for, oh, perhaps half.
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If I had that kind of money, I wouldn’t come to Vietnam, I’d send for it.
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I don’t know if the presidential candidates are running for the White House or Animal House.
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It was a typically British birth… I was three at the time. They had a strike in the maternity ward… I came out in sympathy.
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I get upset over a bad shot just like anyone else. But it’s silly to let the game get to you.
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I like to come to Washington, D.C., at least once a year. Why should my tax money travel more than I do?
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The firm is really ahead of the times. It has a stock market ticker that prints its report on thin aspirins.
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Bigamy is the only crime where two rites make a wrong.
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Laughter is therapy-an instant vacation.
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I was called Rembrandt Hope in my boxing days, because I spent so much time on the canvas.
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Pebble Beach is Alcatraz with grass.
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Television. That’s where movies go when they die.
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When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things – not the great occasions – that in retrospect give off the greatest glow of happiness.
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That’s life. The older you get, the tougher it is to score.
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Milton Hope led the singing of Happy Birthday … He would say, ‘Keep it sweet and short and don’t try to be funny.’
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I asked the colonel what type of aircraft it was, and he said, “Don’t worry about it, Bob. . . if you can see it, it’s obsolete.”
BOB HOPE