Marriage is nature’s way of keeping us from fighting with strangers.
ALAN KINGMy favorite way to spend Saturday is in and out of bed, watching sports on TV and eating.
More Alan King Quotes
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Comedy is an amazing calling. Once you get that first laugh, it’s hard to turn away.
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Now that’s better than sex, but only if the salami is thickly sliced.
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When I read Dickens for the first time, I thought he was Jewish, because he wrote about oppression and bigotry, all the things that my father talked about.
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I didn’t know we were poor until I started giving interviews.
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You want to attack somebody? Make fun of them.
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My father was a dreamer – my hero. He was a smart, tough guy from Poland, a cutter of lady’s handbags.
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I think one of the big things about comedy is the ability for the audience to identify.
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Villains are a ball. People have been laughing at me for 50 years, so I love to sit in the back of the theater and listen to them hate me.
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And humor has always been a weapon. You want to get even on somebody?
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Then, of course, you’re hooked and you have to learn how to survive in the business.
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We get the worrywart, the hypochondriac, the money-grubbing miser, the intractable negotiator…
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But in the movies, I just love the heavies. It’s much more fun.
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Ed Sullivan brought me to TV first in 1952, then Garry Moore’s program gave me a lot of confidence and freedom.
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If you want to read about love and marriage, you’ve got to buy two separate books.
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The other day my house caught fire.
ALAN KING