Let’s face it: It’s difficult enough to be funny without worrying about what is going to offend whom.
ALAN KINGWhen I first saw Richard Pryor perform, I told him, ‘You’re doing a Jewish act.’
More Alan King Quotes
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If you want to read about love and marriage, you’ve got to buy two separate books.
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I was a high school throw-out.
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We watch society. As society behaves, then we have the ability to make fun of it.
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I made it, Ma – Carnegie Hall. And I didn’t have to practice.
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When I get up in the morning, I have to decide what I’m going to have for dinner or I can’t get through the day.
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If you keep yourself alive and current, funny is funny.
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It’s not easy being a father, but I’ve been allowed a comeback.
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For me, that wasn’t such a joke, because my birthday was always around this time.
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The other day my house caught fire.
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As life’s pleasures go, food is second only to sex. Except for salami and eggs.
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I had a sympathetic role in ‘thirtysomething,’ and in two weeks I’m going to do the role again.
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A summary of every Jewish holiday: They tried to kill us, we won, let’s eat!
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My favorite way to spend Saturday is in and out of bed, watching sports on TV and eating.
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When I was a kid, my father used to tell me that everybody was celebrating my birthday. That’s what the trees are all about.
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My mother’s sister was killed in a trolley car accident, so I was raised as one of eight with my sister and six male cousins.
ALAN KING