Many people die of thirst but the Irish are born with one.
SPIKE MILLIGANMy father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ!
More Spike Milligan Quotes
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All I ask is the chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.
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My father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ!
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In India a farmhand was caught in the act with his cow. He said he had bad eyesight and thought it was his wife.
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Australia, Australia, we love you from the heart. The kidneys, the liver & the giblets too. And every other part.
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It was a perfect marrige. She didn`t want to and he couldn`t
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I shook hands with a friendly Arab. I still have my right arm to prove it.
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If I don’t eat soon, I’ll die of hunger; and if I die, I won’t eat soon.
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Blessed are the cracked, for they let in the light.
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A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.
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Listen, someone’s screaming in agony- fortunately I speak it fluently.
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Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, get it out with Optrex.
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My Father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic.
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To Harry Secombe: I hope you die first as I don’t want you singing at my funeral.
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This silent call you make, A silence so loud I fear the world knows it’s meaning If you fill every corner of a room Where can I look? If I close my eyes the silence becomes louder! There is no escape from you The only way out is in
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In the human race today, you came last.
SPIKE MILLIGAN






