Money can’t buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.
SPIKE MILLIGANI have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.
More Spike Milligan Quotes
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Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, get it out with Optrex.
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Its all in the mind, you know.
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A bird in The Strand is worth two in Shepherds Bush.
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Her mother was a cultivated woman – she was born in a greenhouse.
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In the human race today, you came last.
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God made night, But man made darkness.
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If I don’t eat soon, I’ll die of hunger; and if I die, I won’t eat soon.
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In India a farmhand was caught in the act with his cow. He said he had bad eyesight and thought it was his wife.
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Life is a long agonized illness only curable by death.
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I thought I’d begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine.
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Blessed are the cracked, for they let in the light.
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Chopsticks are one of the reasons the Chinese never invented custard.
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Many people die of thirst but the Irish are born with one.
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Are you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs?
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It was a perfect marrige. She didn`t want to and he couldn`t
SPIKE MILLIGAN






