Render any politician down and there’s enough fat to fry an egg.
SPIKE MILLIGANAny man can be 62, but it takes a bus to be 62A.
More Spike Milligan Quotes
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Chopsticks are one of the reasons the Chinese never invented custard.
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There are holes in the sky Where the rain gets in, But they’re ever so small That’s why rain is thin.
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My Father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic.
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If a man dies when you hang him, keep hanging him until he gets used to it.
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God made night, But man made darkness.
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There is a time to live, a time to die, a time to laugh, and at no time are the three of them very far apart.
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Only on the third class tourist class passengers’ deck was it a sultry overcast morning, but then if you do things on the cheap you must expect these things.
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To Harry Secombe: I hope you die first as I don’t want you singing at my funeral.
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Never return to a doctor whose office plants have died. After five days in hospital, I took a turn for the nurse.
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If you kill me, I promise you – you will never take me alive.
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Any man can be 62, but it takes a bus to be 62A.
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Many people die of thirst but the Irish are born with one.
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I’m a hero with coward’s legs.
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I shook hands with a friendly Arab. I still have my right arm to prove it.
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All I ask is the chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.
SPIKE MILLIGAN






