Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men – the other 999 follow women.
GROUCHO MARXRoom service? Send up a larger room.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today.
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Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.
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Any place I hang my head is home.
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I only write first editions.
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Don’t look now, but there’s one man too many in this room, and I think it’s you.
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You can leave in a huff. Or you can leave in a minute and a huff.
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The trouble with writing a book about yourself is that you can’t fool around.
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One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas I’ll never know.
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Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.
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Learn from the mistakes of others. You can never live long enough to make them all yourself.
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Love flies out the door when money comes innuendo.
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Everyone must believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.
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Life is a whim of several billion cells to be you for a while
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Do you mind if I don’t smoke?
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I intend to live forever, or die trying.
GROUCHO MARX