black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

I don’t drink anymore, on the other hand I don’t drink any less either.

W. C. Fields

When you wake up in the morning, smile – and get it over with.
W. C. FIELDS

Morning Smile Wake Up Yourself
I never smoked a cigar in my life until I was nine.
W. C. FIELDS

Life Myself Young
When we have lost everything, including hope, life becomes a disgrace, and death a duty.
W. C. FIELDS

Death Hope Life Lost
If pigs had wings, they would be pigeons.
W. C. FIELDS

Animal Funny Wings
I never drink water. I’m afraid it will become habit-forming.
W. C. FIELDS

Habit Mad Myself Weird
Money will not buy happiness, but it will let you be unhappy in nice places.
W. C. FIELDS

Happiness Instagram Captions Money Place
The clever cat eats cheese and breathes down rat holes with baited breath.
W. C. FIELDS

Animal Breathe
I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.
W. C. FIELDS

Animal Myself Perspective Sea
Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There’s nothing like having a midget for a butler.
W. C. FIELDS

Food Home
Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.
W. C. FIELDS

Alcohol Illusion Reality
Some things are better than sex, and some are worse, but there’s nothing exactly like it.
W. C. FIELDS

Better Sex Worst
It ain’t what they call you, it’s what you answer to.
W. C. FIELDS

Attitude Deep Yourself
Take me down to the bar! We’ll drink breakfast together!
W. C. FIELDS

Togetherness Travel
I’m free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
W. C. FIELDS

Equality Freedom Hate Myself
Wouldn’t it be terrible if I quoted some reliable statistics which prove that more people are driven insane through religious hysteria than by drinking alcohol.
W. C. FIELDS

Alcohol Myself People Religious Sanity
Some weasel took the cork out of my lunch.
W. C. FIELDS

Animal Food

I don’t drink anymore, on the other hand I don’t drink any less either.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

I don’t drink anymore, on the other hand I don’t drink any less either.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More W. C. Fields Quotes