black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

I don’t drink anymore, on the other hand I don’t drink any less either.

W. C. Fields

Now don’t say you can’t swear off drinking; it’s easy. I’ve done it a thousand times.
W. C. FIELDS

Easy Time Yourself
Yes I do like children, Girl children, about eighteen or twenty.
W. C. FIELDS

Children Myself Woman
If you can’t dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.
W. C. FIELDS

Choice Inspirational Yourself
I never smoked a cigar in my life until I was nine.
W. C. FIELDS

Life Myself Young
I exercise strong self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.
W. C. FIELDS

Control Food Myself Strong
You can’t cheat an honest man.
W. C. FIELDS

Honesty Man Yourself
Sleep! The most beautiful experience in life. Except drink.
W. C. FIELDS

Beautiful Experience Life
Prayers never bring anything, They may bring solace to the sap, the bigot, the ignorant, the aboriginal, and the lazy – but to the enlightened it is the same as asking Santa Claus to bring you something for Xmas.
W. C. FIELDS

Gift Ignorance Peace Prayer Wisdom
The nation needs to return to the colonial way of life, when a wife was judged by the amount of wood she could split.
W. C. FIELDS

Herself Judgement Life Nation Need Wife
I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.
W. C. FIELDS

Animal Myself Perspective Sea
A man without a woman is like a neck without a pain.
W. C. FIELDS

Man Pain Woman
Comedy is merely tragedy happening to someone else.
W. C. FIELDS

Deep Reality Tragedy
Try till you succeed, if you don’t succeed once, then destroy all evidence of the fact that you tried!
W. C. FIELDS

Destroy Evidence Success Yourself
Wouldn’t it be terrible if I quoted some reliable statistics which prove that more people are driven insane through religious hysteria than by drinking alcohol.
W. C. FIELDS

Alcohol Myself People Religious Sanity
Start every day off with a smile and get it over with.
W. C. FIELDS

Morning Smile Start
Philadelphia, wonderful town, spent a week there one night.
W. C. FIELDS

Night Time Wonderful

I don’t drink anymore, on the other hand I don’t drink any less either.

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I don’t drink anymore, on the other hand I don’t drink any less either.

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