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Trust everybody, but cut the cards yourself.

W. C. Fields

Just like my Uncle Charlie used to say, just before he sprung the trap: He said, You can’t cheat and honest man! Never give a sucker an even break or smarten up a chump!
W. C. FIELDS

Break Himself Honesty Man Myself Smart Yourself
When we have lost everything, including hope, life becomes a disgrace, and death a duty.
W. C. FIELDS

Death Hope Life Lost
A thing worth having is a thing worth cheating for.
W. C. FIELDS

Worth Wrong
Prayers never bring anything, They may bring solace to the sap, the bigot, the ignorant, the aboriginal, and the lazy – but to the enlightened it is the same as asking Santa Claus to bring you something for Xmas.
W. C. FIELDS

Gift Ignorance Peace Prayer Wisdom
I must have a drink of breakfast.
W. C. FIELDS

Food Morning Myself
This job will drive me to drink, and for that reason, I will be eternally grateful.
W. C. FIELDS

Drive Grateful Myself Reason
Philadelphia, wonderful town, spent a week there one night.
W. C. FIELDS

Night Time Wonderful
If it does not work the first time, try, try again. Then quit. No need to be an idiot.
W. C. FIELDS

Need Quit Stupidity Time
Children should neither be seen or heard from – ever again.
W. C. FIELDS

Children Hate See
You can’t cheat an honest man.
W. C. FIELDS

Honesty Man Yourself
Try till you succeed, if you don’t succeed once, then destroy all evidence of the fact that you tried!
W. C. FIELDS

Destroy Evidence Success Yourself
The world is getting to be such a dangerous place, a man is lucky to get out of it alive.
W. C. FIELDS

Alive Danger Man Place World
I’m looking for loopholes. (Said when caught reading the Bible.
W. C. FIELDS

Myself Religious
You can’t trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it.
W. C. FIELDS

Belief Trust Yourself
I don’t believe in dining on an empty stomach.
W. C. FIELDS

Believe Empty Food Myself Weird
I exercise strong self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.
W. C. FIELDS

Control Food Myself Strong

Trust everybody, but cut the cards yourself.

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Trust everybody, but cut the cards yourself.

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