black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

Trust everybody, but cut the cards yourself.

W. C. Fields

I have spent a lot of time searching through the Bible for loopholes.
W. C. FIELDS

Myself Religion Time
I drink therefore I am.
W. C. FIELDS

Instagram Captions Myself One Liner
I’m free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
W. C. FIELDS

Equality Freedom Hate Myself
Comedy is a serious business. A serious business with only one purpose -to make people laugh.
W. C. FIELDS

Business Laugh Oneself People Purpose Serious
Take me down to the bar! We’ll drink breakfast together!
W. C. FIELDS

Togetherness Travel
It’s a funny old world. A man’s lucky if he gets out of it alive.
W. C. FIELDS

Alive Funny Old World
Comedy is merely tragedy happening to someone else.
W. C. FIELDS

Deep Reality Tragedy
I used to be indecisive, now I’m not so sure.
W. C. FIELDS

Improvement Myself
Wouldn’t it be terrible if I quoted some reliable statistics which prove that more people are driven insane through religious hysteria than by drinking alcohol.
W. C. FIELDS

Alcohol Myself People Religious Sanity
Everybody’s got to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.
W. C. FIELDS

Alcohol Believe
I never smoked a cigar in my life until I was nine.
W. C. FIELDS

Life Myself Young
I drink with impunity, or anyone else who invites me.
W. C. FIELDS

Company Myself
Philadelphia, wonderful town, spent a week there one night.
W. C. FIELDS

Night Time Wonderful
I was in love with a beautiful blonde once. She drove me to drink. That’s the one thing I’m indebted to her for.
W. C. FIELDS

Beautiful Herself Love Myself
Marry an outdoors woman. Then if you throw her out into the yard on a cold night, she can still survive.
W. C. FIELDS

Marriage Night Survive Woman
If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There’s no point in being a damn fool about it.
W. C. FIELDS

Fools Inspirational Quit Success Yourself

Trust everybody, but cut the cards yourself.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

Trust everybody, but cut the cards yourself.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More W. C. Fields Quotes