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When everything’s coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane.

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Inspirational Motivational Struggle Way Wrong Yourself

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

Why isn’t the number 11 pronounced onety one?
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Support bacteria – they’re the only culture some people have.
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No one is listening until you make a mistake.
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Listening Mistake Yourself
I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet. So I said, “Got any shoes you’re not using?
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Funny Man Sad Yourself
How come Superman could stop bullets with his chest, but always ducked when someone threw a gun at him?
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I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
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Half the people you know are below average.
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Average Level People Yourself
I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.
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Break Up Imagination Myself Relationship
There’s a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.
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Idiot Ocean Stand Wait
My doctor told me I shouldn’t work out until I’m in better shape. I told him, ‘All right; don’t send me a bill until I pay you.’
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Better Doctor Myself Pay Right Work Yourself
I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.
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Lost Myself Place Thinking
If Dracula can’t see his reflection in a mirror, how come his hair is always so neatly combed?
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Hairs Himself Mirror Reflection See
How come abbreviated is such a long word?
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Funny Literature Word
Clones are people two.
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One Liner People
Why, in a country of free speech, are there phone bills?
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If a man says something in the woods and there are no women there, is he still wrong?
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Forest Funny Himself Man Nature Woman Wrong

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