My father was my greatest inspiration. He was a lunatic.
SPIKE MILLIGANAll I ask is the chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.
More Spike Milligan Quotes
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Any man can be 62, but it takes a bus to be 62A.
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This silent call you make, A silence so loud I fear the world knows it’s meaning If you fill every corner of a room Where can I look? If I close my eyes the silence becomes louder! There is no escape from you The only way out is in
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Only on the third class tourist class passengers’ deck was it a sultry overcast morning, but then if you do things on the cheap you must expect these things.
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Education isn’t everything, for a start it isn’t an elephant.
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Life is a long agonized illness only curable by death.
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My father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ!
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In the human race today, you came last.
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Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion.
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Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, get it out with Optrex.
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I shook hands with a friendly Arab. I still have my right arm to prove it.
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Her mother was a cultivated woman – she was born in a greenhouse.
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A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.
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I spent many years laughing at Harry Secombe’s singing until somebody told me that it wasn’t a joke.
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Never return to a doctor whose office plants have died. After five days in hospital, I took a turn for the nurse.
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There is a time to live, a time to die, a time to laugh, and at no time are the three of them very far apart.
SPIKE MILLIGAN






