Policemen are numbered in case they get lost.
SPIKE MILLIGANAll I ask is the chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.
More Spike Milligan Quotes
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There are holes in the sky Where the rain gets in, But they’re ever so small That’s why rain is thin.
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In the human race today, you came last.
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I cannot stand being awake, the pain is too much.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
I can speak Esperanto like a native.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
There is a time to live, a time to die, a time to laugh, and at no time are the three of them very far apart.
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How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.
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Blessed are the cracked, for they let in the light.
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I’m a hero with coward’s legs.
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We were making love in the back of a truck and we got carried away.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
If you kill me, I promise you – you will never take me alive.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it’s all in perfect working order.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
My father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ!
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Many people die of thirst but the Irish are born with one.
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Its all in the mind, you know.
SPIKE MILLIGAN -
If a man dies when you hang him, keep hanging him until he gets used to it.
SPIKE MILLIGAN






