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It was a perfect marrige. She didn`t want to and he couldn`t

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I told you I was ill. (On his headstone)
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Myself Sick Yourself
You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all the people some of the time, which is just long enough to be president of the United States.
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Country Enough Fools Funny People Politics Time Yourself
I can speak Esperanto like a native.
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If a man dies when you hang him, keep hanging him until he gets used to it.
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I thought I’d begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine.
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Are you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs?
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Education isn’t everything, for a start it isn’t an elephant.
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I told you I was sick.
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We were making love in the back of a truck and we got carried away.
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Car Carry Love Relationship Sex Vehicle
There is a time to live, a time to die, a time to laugh, and at no time are the three of them very far apart.
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Death Far Laughter Live Time
Its all in the mind, you know.
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Mindset One Liner Yourself
I’m Irish. We think sideways.
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Identity Myself One Liner Thinking
If you kill me, I promise you – you will never take me alive.
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Alive Kill Myself Promise Yourself
I’m a hero with coward’s legs.
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Coward Hero Legs Myself
Blessed are the cracked, for they let in the light.
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Blessing Deep Hard Time Light Perspective Philosophy
Money can’t buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.
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Form Happiness Misery Money Yourself

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