If a man dies when you hang him, keep hanging him until he gets used to it.
SPIKE MILLIGANBlessed are the cracked, for they let in the light.
More Spike Milligan Quotes
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Any man can be 62, but it takes a bus to be 62A.
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Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, get it out with Optrex.
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In India a farmhand was caught in the act with his cow. He said he had bad eyesight and thought it was his wife.
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A bird in The Strand is worth two in Shepherds Bush.
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God made night, But man made darkness.
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Listen, someone’s screaming in agony- fortunately I speak it fluently.
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I cannot stand being awake, the pain is too much.
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My Father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic.
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I shook hands with a friendly Arab. I still have my right arm to prove it.
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Are you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs?
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There is a time to live, a time to die, a time to laugh, and at no time are the three of them very far apart.
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Education isn’t everything, for a start it isn’t an elephant.
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I’m Irish. We think sideways.
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Money can’t buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.
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All I ask is the chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.
SPIKE MILLIGAN