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Some dog I got too. We call him Egypt. Because in every room he leaves a pyramid.

Rodney Dangerfield

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Country Dog Every Leave Pyramid Room Some

Bagwalas

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My wife’s jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was.
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Calendar Day Get Jealous Look May Other Ridiculous Want Wife
I came from a real tough neighborhood. I put my hand in some cement and felt another hand.
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Another Came Cement Felt Hand Neighborhood Real Some Tough
My mother had morning sickness after I was born.
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Born I Morning Mother Sickness
Acting deals with very delicate emotions. It is not putting up a mask.
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Acting Del Delicate Mask Put Very
I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender.
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Bartender Plumber Psychiatrist See Seen Told Truth Wife
I haven’t spoken to my wife in years. I didn’t want to interrupt her.
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Interrupt Spoken Wife Year
When I was born I was so ugly the doctor slapped my mother.
RODNEY DANGERFIELD

Born Doctor Mother Slap Ugly
I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio.
RODNEY DANGERFIELD

Bath Hate Parent Radio Toast Toy
I saved a girl from being attacked last night. I controlled myself.
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Attack Control Girl Last Myself Night Save
My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met.
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Happy Met Twenty Wife Year
What a dog I got, his favorite bone is in my arm.
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Arm Bone Dog Favorite My
I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face.
RODNEY DANGERFIELD

Asleep Blind Day Face Kid Library Man One Pimple Plenty Raed Wake
Life is just a bowl of pits.
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Bowl Just Life Pit
My cousin’s gay, he went to London only to find out that Big Ben was a clock.
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Ben Big Clock Country Cousin Find Gay
My mother never breast fed me, she told me she only liked me as a friend.
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Breast Fed Friend Like Me Mover never Only She Told
My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you’re ugly too.
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Crazy Opinion Psychiatrist Said Second

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