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Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing.

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Before Clean Grow House Kid Shovel Snow Stop Up

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

Any time three New Yorkers get into a cab without an argument, a bank has just been robbed.
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Any Argument Bank Been Cab Country Just Robbed Three Time
I always wondered how I could tell when the right one came along – but it was easy. He was the only one that came along.
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Along Always Easy Only Same Tell Understand
Health – what my friends are always drinking to before they fall down.
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Always Before Down Drink Fall Friend Health
I love to go to the doctor. Where else would a man look at me and say, ‘Take off your clothes’?
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Cloth Doctor Go Look Love Man Say Take
I don’t know how you feel about old age… but in my case I didn’t even see it coming. It hit me from the rear.
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Age Come How Feel Me Old Rear See Should
I asked my hairdresser what would look good on me. She says a Los Angeles Rams football helmet.
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Ask Country Football Good Hairdresser Helmet Look People Person Say
There’s such a buildup of crud in my oven, there’s only room to bake a single cupcake.
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Bake Buildup Crud Cupcake Open Roo Single Such
My own laugh is the real thing and I’ve had it all my life.
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All Life Own Real Thing
To get a roaster clean, send something like baked apples in it to a neighbor. Neighbors always return pans spotless, and you won’t have to use a blow torch on it like you usually do.
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Apply Clean Neighbour Roaster Something
I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.
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Afford All Children Move Them Thing Want
A passport picture is a photo of a man that he can laugh at without realizing that it looks exactly the way his friends see him.
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Exactly Friend Laugh Look Man Passport Photo Picture Realize
If your husband wants to lick the beaters on the mixer, shut them off before you give them to him.
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Beaten Before Him Husband Lick Mixer Want
A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.
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Curve Set Smile Straight
If my jeans could talk, they’d plead for mercy.
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Jealous Mercy Pilead Talk
Tranquilizers work only if you follow the advice on the bottle – keep away from children.
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Advice Away Bottle Children Follow Keep Transquilzer Work
The constants all through the centuries will be the same; wine, women and song. Other than that, life will be very different technologically. In the year 3000 the universe will be expanding as it will forever, infinitely. We will probe outer space but never find life as evolutionized as ours
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Constant Difference Other Same Song Technology Thought Wine Year

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