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We Californians are constantly accused of not having seasons, but we do. We have fire, flood, mud, and drought.

Related Topics

Accused Constant Country Drought Fire Food Mud Swanson

Bagwalas

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Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
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Burt Reynolds once asked me out. I was in his room.
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I’m eighteen years behind in my ironing.
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My idea of exercise is a good brisk sit.
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I’m at an age when my back goes out more than I do.
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Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age – as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.
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I was in a beauty contest once. I not only came in last, I was hit in the mouth by Miss Congeniality.
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By far the most common craving of pregnant women is not to be pregnant.
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My husband is so cheap. On Christmas Eve, he fires one shot and tells the kids Santa committed suicide.
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Maybe it’s true that life begins at fifty. But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.
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I love to go to the doctor. Where else would a man look at me and say, ‘Take off your clothes’?
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When you play spin the bottle, if they don’t want to kiss you they have to give you a quarter. Well, hell, by the time I was twelve years old I owned my own home.
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We spend the first twelve months of our children’s lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.
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Nothing was happening in the bedroom. I nicknamed our waterbed the Dead Sea.
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