There are two things which a man should scrupulously avoid: giving advice that he would not follow, and asking advice when he is determined to pursue his own opinion.
NORM MACDONALDThough we may not desire to detect fraud, we must not, on that account, endeavor to be insensible of it, for, as cunning is a crime, so is duplicity a fault, and if men dread knaves, they also despise fools.
More Norm MacDonald Quotes
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This would have been a great game to watch if we didn’t have any money on it.
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It is often better to be restricted to necessity than unconfined in the measure of our desires: prosperity destroys more individuals than adversity ruins.
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I want you to buy this pit bull. This will protect your valuables.’ I don’t own anything very valuable. If I buy the pit bull, that would be the most valuable thing I own. I’d have to buy something to protect it then.
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I’m thankful for women. I think women are more intelligent than men. Also, without women, there would be no cookies.
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I don’t know the difference between a hippie and a hipster but, it’s fun to watch either one of them get beat up.
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Ever see this? It’s a homeless guy but he’s got a dog… The dog’s really thrilled with this idea. The dog’s going, Hey pal, I can do this by myself pretty well. The longest walk in the world you got me on here.
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All that weak people learn from disappointment, is less confidence in future enterprise.
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Some men are tempted to violate secrecy from the uneasiness secrecy gives them, and others, merely to impress you with the extent of their confidence.
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I got my computer. The great thing about the computer is that you only need enough money to buy a computer and some food, and you’re all right. I don’t have to go to premières.
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The beginning of wisdom is the knowledge of folly.
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Few people love with the violence they hate.
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Violent people usually express their love of a thing by their hatred of its opposite.
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Many frequently change their principles, but seldom their practices.
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If you desire praise or esteem, endeavor to merit it.
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Some people are so much afraid of being deceived, that they never venture to trust; like misers, their avarice destroys their gain.
NORM MACDONALD