Love flies out the door when money comes innuendo.
GROUCHO MARXLove flies out the door when money comes innuendo.
GROUCHO MARXShe got her looks from her father. He’s a plastic surgeon.
GROUCHO MARXI wouldn’t want to belong to a club that would have me as a member.
GROUCHO MARXSomebody once said it’s what you dont see you’re interested in, and this is true.
GROUCHO MARXIf you’ve heard this story before, don’t stop me, because I’d like to hear it again.
GROUCHO MARXI was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
GROUCHO MARXWhen you’re in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, ‘Damn, that was fun’.
GROUCHO MARXGetting older is no problem. You just have to live long enough.
GROUCHO MARXMilitary intelligence is a contradiction in terms.
GROUCHO MARXThe trouble with writing a book about yourself is that you can’t fool around.
GROUCHO MARXThose are my principles, and if you don’t like them, well I have others.
GROUCHO MARXLife is a whim of several billion cells to be you for a while
GROUCHO MARXYou can leave in a huff. Or you can leave in a minute and a huff.
GROUCHO MARXA year ago I came here without a nickle in my pocket, now, I’ve got a nickle in my pocket.
GROUCHO MARXAnyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.
GROUCHO MARXI only write first editions.
GROUCHO MARX