Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped.
GROUCHO MARXAge is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.
More Groucho Marx Quotes
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The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
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I think women are sexy when they got some clothes on. And if later they take them off then you’ve triumphed.
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Once I put it down I couldn’t pick it back up.
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Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.
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Before I speak, I have something important to say.
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Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light.
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You can leave in a huff. Or you can leave in a minute and a huff.
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Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.
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I have nothing but respect for you and not much of that.
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Everyone must believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.
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I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll be glad to make an exception.
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Laugh and the world laughs with you, cry and you’re probably watching the wrong channel.
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I’m not crazy about reality, but it’s still the only place to get a decent meal.
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Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy
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I’ve been looking for a girl like you – not you, but a girl like you.
GROUCHO MARX






