Jimmy Stewart could have been a good golfer, but he speaks so slowly that by the time he yells ‘Fore!’ the guy he’s hit is already in an ambulance on the way to the hospital.
BOB HOPEA photographer kept shooting me every time I swung. I was very flattered until I found out he was from Field and Stream.
More Bob Hope Quotes
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I don’t know what people have against Jimmy Carter. He’s done nothing.
BOB HOPE -
I do benefits for all religions – I’d hate to blow the hereafter on a technicality.
BOB HOPE -
One of the greatest gifts to mankind is laughter, and one of the greatest gifts to laughter is Lucille Ball. God has her now but thanks to television, we’ll have her forever.
BOB HOPE -
He was bare chested and in good trim. I said that just looking at him I knew there would always be an England
BOB HOPE -
I went to play golf and tried to shoot my age, but I shot my weight instead.
BOB HOPE -
My next door neighbor just had a pacemaker installed. They’re still working the bugs out, though. Every time he makes love, my garage door opens.
BOB HOPE -
Bigamy is the only crime where two rites make a wrong.
BOB HOPE -
That’s life. The older you get, the tougher it is to score.
BOB HOPE -
There are many talented English personalities, but unfortunately they were all in Hollywood.
BOB HOPE -
It’s a wonderful world. It may destroy itself but you’ll be able to watch it all on TV.
BOB HOPE -
Kids are wonderful, but I like mine barbecued.
BOB HOPE -
It’s very frustrating making a picture in Paris. We work hard all day at the studio to get a love scene just right. Then, on my way home, I see couples on every street corner doing it better.
BOB HOPE -
I’ve been playing the game so long that my handicap is in Roman numerals.
BOB HOPE -
I just hope I don’t have to explain all the times I’ve used His name in vain when I get up there.
BOB HOPE -
I don’t know if the presidential candidates are running for the White House or Animal House.
BOB HOPE