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And on nearby islands, the Japanese army was eating raw fish. We felt sorry for them.

Bob Hope

Golf is a funny game. It’s done much for health, and at the same time has ruined people by robbing them of their peace of mind. Look at me, I’m the healthiest idiot in the world.
BOB HOPE

Games Golf Hope Look People Ruin
A photographer kept shooting me every time I swung. I was very flattered until I found out he was from Field and Stream.
BOB HOPE

Fields Flatterers Golf Shooting
I’ll shoot my age if I have to live to be 105.
BOB HOPE

Age Golf Live Shoot
We didn’t know that in America after the war, you wouldn’t be able to get into a sushi joint without a reservation. And we thought they lost.
BOB HOPE

Able Although Country Lost Reservation
Rock and roll is catching on all over . . . France . . . England . . . They even have it in Japan, only over there they call it judo.
BOB HOPE

Funny Humorous Rocks
You know you’ve reached middle age when your weightlifting consists merely of standing up.
BOB HOPE

Age Country Middle People Weightlifting
The service at the Imperial (Tokyo) is the finest I’ve encountered anywhere. There was a button next to my bed marked ROOM SERVICE – and a maid to press it for me.
BOB HOPE

Button Country Funny Hotel Humorous Maid Press Room Service
The Concorde is great. It gives you three extra hours to find your luggage.
BOB HOPE

Funny Giving Humor
When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things – not the great occasions – that in retrospect give off the greatest glow of happiness.
BOB HOPE

Happiness Inspirational Laughter
A very, very religious man. Every time I eat a peanut, I feel immortal.
BOB HOPE

Men One Line Religious
Most of the people who came for dancing lessons had Rumba ambitions and minuet bodies
BOB HOPE

Ambition Dancing People
Dying is to be avoided because it can ruin your whole career.
BOB HOPE

Careers Dying Line One
It’s so cold here in Washington, D.C., that politicians have their hands in their own pockets.
BOB HOPE

Cold Hands Pockets Politician
I’ve never wanted an Oscar, although they are reassuring to an actor who doesn’t know how really great he is.
BOB HOPE

Actors Oscar Reassuring
She said she was approaching forty, and I couldn’t help wondering from what direction.
BOB HOPE

Comedy Direction Helping Life Wondering
Now that the war is winding down, I want to say I do appreciate you fellows hanging around here – just for me.
BOB HOPE

Appreciate Want War Winding

And on nearby islands, the Japanese army was eating raw fish. We felt sorry for them.

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And on nearby islands, the Japanese army was eating raw fish. We felt sorry for them.

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Popular Authors

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