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America is a country where the Olympics and the divorce lawyers both have the same slogan – Go for the Gold.

Bob Hope

I don’t know if the presidential candidates are running for the White House or Animal House.
BOB HOPE

Animal Running White
When you get over 95, every day is your day.
BOB HOPE

Country Day Every Get Over People
The big difference in those days was that in England the Government subsidized TV, in America we work on TV so we can subsidize the Government.
BOB HOPE

Country Funny Government Humorous People
I’ve always felt England was a great place for a comic to work. It’s an island and the audience can’t run very far.
BOB HOPE

Funny Humorous Running
Lots of travel, away from home.
BOB HOPE

Away From Home Line One
The old water heater in my dressing room was working, but it was kind of tired. It gave off about as much warmth as an agent’s handshake.
BOB HOPE

Funny Handshake Tired Water
As the colonel and I sat swapping stories in the plane, a jet aircraft buzzed past our window.
BOB HOPE

Food Funny Humorous
My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others. Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that?
BOB HOPE

Christmas Holiday Old Fashioned Xmas
The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.
BOB HOPE

Apart Dog Miles Pet Tree
We’re on our way to the Persian Gulf. Wait! It’s a mistake! I thought they said Persian Golf.
BOB HOPE

Golf Mistake Persian Waiting Way
I like to come to Washington, D.C., at least once a year. Why should my tax money travel more than I do?
BOB HOPE

One Should Taxes Travel Years
Television is the box they buried entertainment in.
BOB HOPE

Boxes Entertainment Television
The only thing chicken about Israel is their soup.
BOB HOPE

Country Humorous People Soup
The best thing about growing older is that it takes such a long time.
BOB HOPE

Age Growing Long
I do benefits for all religions – I’d hate to blow the hereafter on a technicality.
BOB HOPE

Friend Funny Hate Inspiration
I was there. I saw your sons and your husbands, your brothers and your sweethearts. I saw how they worked, played, fought, and lived. I saw some of them die.
BOB HOPE

Brother Country Day Die Husband Veterans

America is a country where the Olympics and the divorce lawyers both have the same slogan – Go for the Gold.

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America is a country where the Olympics and the divorce lawyers both have the same slogan – Go for the Gold.

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Popular Authors

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