Laughter is therapy-an instant vacation.
BOB HOPEI tell jokes to pay my green fees.
More Bob Hope Quotes
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Baseball is a soap opera that plays out day after day, one that a lot of elderly women watch until the characters and the plot becomes a part of their life.
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I was lucky I wasn’t a better boxer, or that’s what I’d be now – a punchy ex-pug.
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It’s amazing how many people you see on TV. I did my first television show a month ago, and the next day five million television sets were sold. The people who couldn’t sell theirs threw them away.
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As the colonel and I sat swapping stories in the plane, a jet aircraft buzzed past our window.
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I get upset over a bad shot just like anyone else. But it’s silly to let the game get to you.
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We have 51 golf courses in Palm Springs. He [President Ford] never decides which course he will play until after the first tee shot.
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I led such a sheltered life I didn’t go out with girls until I was almost four.
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You know you’ve reached middle age when your weightlifting consists merely of standing up.
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Cypress Point is such a beautiful place, but it’s also very exclusive. They had a very successful membership drive last month. They drove out forty members.
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President Eisenhower has given up golf for painting. It takes fewer strokes.
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Sure Vietnam is a dirty war. I’ve never heard of a clean one.
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The stealth bomber is supposed to be a big deal. It flies in undetected, bombs, then flies away. Hell, I’ve been doing that all my life.
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Dying is to be avoided because it can ruin your whole career.
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I’ve always been in the right place and time. Of course, I steered myself there.
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Personally, I never drink on Oscar nights, as it interferes with my suffering.
BOB HOPE