No matter how calmly you try to referee, parenting will eventually produce bizarre behavior, and I’m not talking about the kids. Their behavior is always normal.
BILL COSBYAdvertising is the most fun you can have with your clothes on.
More Bill Cosby Quotes
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Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.
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I brought you in this world, and I can take you out!
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A word to the wise ain’t necessary, it’s the stupid ones who need advice.
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Parents are not interested in justice, they’re interested in peace and quiet.
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All Children Have Brain Damage!
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Give me 200 active 2-year-olds and I could conquer the world.
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Old is always fifteen years from now.
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You can teach an old dog new tricks. You just don’t want to see the dog doing them.
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The heart of marriage is memories; and if the two of you happen to have the same ones and can savor your reruns, then your marriage is a gift from the gods.
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A sail boat that sails backwards can never see the sun rise.
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I’m supposed to figure out if the glass is half full or half empty, I told her. Without a moment’s hesitation, in a split second, my grandmother shrugged and said: It depends on if you’re drinking or pouring.
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The past is a ghost, the future a dream and all we ever have is now.
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When you graduate from college, they tell you to follow your dreams. Does anyone say you have to wake up first?
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Is the glass half full, or half empty? It depends on whether you’re pouring, or drinking.
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People can be more forgiving than you can imagine. But you have to forgive yourself. Let go of what’s bitter and move on.
BILL COSBY







