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Human beings are the only creatures that allow their children to come back home.

Bill Cosby

I guess the real reason that my wife and I had children is the same reason that Napoleon had for invading Russia: it seemed like a good idea at the time.
BILL COSBY

Children Goodness Ideas Myself Reality Reason Time
Suddenly, this romantic agony was enriched by a less romantic one: I had to go to the bathroom. Needless to say, I couldn’t let her know about this urge, for great lovers never did such things. The answer to Romeo Romeo, wherefore art thou, Romeo? Was not In the men’s room, Julie.
BILL COSBY

Fantasy Funny Greatness Oneself Romantic
No matter how calmly you try to referee, parenting will eventually produce bizarre behavior, and I’m not talking about the kids. Their behavior is always normal.
BILL COSBY

Children Ordinary Parents Talk
That’s why ears have cartilage, to keep them from flapping.
BILL COSBY

Body Philosophy Science
As I have discovered by examining my past, I started out as a child. Coincidentally, so did my brother. My mother did not put all her eggs in one basket, so to speak: she gave me a younger brother named Russell, who taught me what was meant by survival of the fittest.
BILL COSBY

Children Mom Myself Oneself Past Science Start Young
In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.
BILL COSBY

Desire Failure Fear Greatness Success
It is a point of pride for the American male to keep the same size jockey shorts for his entire life.
BILL COSBY

Life Man Pride
Give me 200 active 2-year-olds and I could conquer the world.
BILL COSBY

Myself World
When you become senile, you won’t know it.
BILL COSBY

One Liner Yourself
Every closed eye is not sleeping, and every open eye is not seeing.
BILL COSBY

Deep Eyes See
All parents experience the same problems.
BILL COSBY

Experience Parents Problem
Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry.
BILL COSBY

Carry Children End Funny Name
Parents are not interested in justice, they’re interested in peace and quiet.
BILL COSBY

Justice Parents Peace Quiet
Is the glass half full, or half empty? It depends on whether you’re pouring, or drinking.
BILL COSBY

Deep Empty Philosophy Yourself
The serve was invented so that the net could play.
BILL COSBY

Invention Play
People can be more forgiving than you can imagine. But you have to forgive yourself. Let go of what’s bitter and move on.
BILL COSBY

Forgiveness Imagination Move On People Yourself

Human beings are the only creatures that allow their children to come back home.

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Human beings are the only creatures that allow their children to come back home.

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