“Age, with his eyes in the back of his head, thinks it wisdom to see the bogs through which he has floundered.”

Fidelity – a virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.

LAWYER, n. One skilled in circumvention of the law.

A person who doubts himself is like a man who would enlist in the ranks of his enemies and bear arms agains himself. He makes his failure certain by himself being the first person to be convinced of it.

ARMOR, n. The kind of clothing worn by a man whose tailor is a blacksmith.

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.

The partisan strife in which the people of the country are permitted to periodically engage does not tend to the development of ugly traits of character, but merely discloses those that preexist.

Fear has no brains; it is an idiot.

Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs.

Money. A blessing that is of no advantage to us excepting when we part with it.

Pray: To ask the laws of the universe to be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.

Life – a spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay.

Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding.

Vote: the instrument and symbol of a freeman’s power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.

Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.

All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusions is called a philosopher.

Memories, pressed between the pages of my mind. Memories, sweetened through the ages just like wine.

A woman has the age she deserves.

Relationships are like Rome – difficult to start out, incredible during the prosperity of the ‘golden age’, and unbearable during the fall.

Who acts, shall endure. So speaks the voice of the age-old wisdom.

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman’s birthday but never remembers her age.

From the age of three, I played every day-morning, afternoon and night.

You’re never too old, too wacky, too wild, to pick up a book and read to a child.

The ruling ideas of each age have ever been the ideas of its ruling class.