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Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.

Ambrose Bierce

LAWYER, n. One skilled in circumvention of the law.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Law Oneself Skills
Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man – who has no gills.
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Body Man Ocean World
April fool, n. The March fool with another month added to his folly.
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Add Fools Funny Himself Time
Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.
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Ambition Death Desire Enemy Friendship
REALISM, n. The art of depicting nature as it is seem by toads. The charm suffusing a landscape painted by a mole, or a story written by a measuring-worm.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Art Charm Measurement Nature Worm
Alliance – in international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each other’s pockets that they cannot separately plunder a third.
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Each Other Hands International Separate Thief Union
There are two instruments worse than a clarinet – two clarinets.
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Instrument Worst
I think that I think, therefore I think that I am.
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Myself Reputation Thinking
Don’t steal; thou’lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
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Business Cheating Complete Steal Success
Democracy is defended in 3 stages. Ballot Box, Jury Box, Cartridge Box.
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Box Defend Democracy Stage
LIFE, n. A spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay. We live in daily apprehension of its loss; yet when lost it is not missed.
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Body Life Missing Spiritual
In each human heart are a tiger, a pig, an ass and a nightingale. Diversity of character is due to their unequal activity.
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Activity Diversity Equality Heart Human
Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.
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Food Place Religion Service State
Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.
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Children Cold Compassionate Feeling Love Mom
Belladonna, n.: In Italian a beautiful lady; in English a deadly poison. A striking example of the essential identity of the two tongues.
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Beautiful Death Essential Example Poison
Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.
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Leadership Philosophy Road
He who thinks with difficulty believes with alacrity. A fool is a natural proselyte, but he must be caught young, for his convictions, unlike those of the wise, harden with age.
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Age Believe Fools Hard Thinking Wisdom Young
They say that hens do cackle loudest when there is nothing vital in the eggs they have laid.
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Animal Born Egg Loud Lying
Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding.
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Art Human Limitation Reason Thinking Understand
Fear has no brains; it is an idiot.
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Brain Fear Idiot One Liner
Forgetfulness – a gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscience.
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Conscience Destitution Forget Gift God
Vote: the instrument and symbol of a freeman’s power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.
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Country Fools Freedom Instrument Power
PITY, n. A failing sense of exemption, inspired by contrast.
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Contrast Fall Sense
Democracy is four wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch.
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Democracy Lamb Lunch Vote Wolf
Life – a spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay.
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Body Decay Life Selfish
Money. A blessing that is of no advantage to us excepting when we part with it.
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Blessing Exception Leaving Money
ARMOR, n. The kind of clothing worn by a man whose tailor is a blacksmith.
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Blacksmith Cloth Kind Man

Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.

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Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.

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