I don’t mind being 65, but nobody is gonna tell me to come in at 5:30 to have the early bird special.
ALAN KINGMilton took vaudeville, which, if you look up ‘vaudeville’ in the dictionary, right alongside of it, it says ‘Milton Berle’ – and he made it just a tremendous party.
More Alan King Quotes
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The ability to absorb a book and make someone else’s words and story your own was exactly was I was doing on stage.
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If you want to read about love and marriage, you’ve got to buy two separate books.
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The world is full of little dictators trying to run your life.
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I was a high school throw-out.
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When I read Dickens for the first time, I thought he was Jewish, because he wrote about oppression and bigotry, all the things that my father talked about.
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When I was a kid, my father used to tell me that everybody was celebrating my birthday. That’s what the trees are all about.
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And humor has always been a weapon. You want to get even on somebody?
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We get the worrywart, the hypochondriac, the money-grubbing miser, the intractable negotiator…
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I’m only… I’m only unhappy when the reviews are bad, but give me a good review and I’m a… I’m just screaming all over the place with joy.
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But in the movies, I just love the heavies. It’s much more fun.
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My brother is the youngest member of the College of Physicians and Surgeons. And I wouldn’t let him cut my nails.
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The other day my house caught fire.
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I didn’t know we were poor until I started giving interviews.
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I think one of the big things about comedy is the ability for the audience to identify.
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Larry David finds a way to make jokes about the Holocaust. It would never have occurred to me. And it was funny.
ALAN KING